You already have that white blonde hair…slick it back…now paint yourself grey. That’s right your whole effing body head to toe. Find a black dress that’s a bit booby and we’re gonna split it at the hem…sort of like…well an octopus actually. Red lip’s are the finishing touch. Shove your lippy in this INCREDIBLE Alexander Mcqueen clutch and your ready to go. You’ll be wailing ‘poor unfortunate soulsss’ when you see how drab everyone else is dressed. Yes I have transformed you into Ursula from The Little Mermaid, but wasn’t she fabulous? I’m imagining that ruby eyed skull suddenly animated from within your grip…issuing a Divine style cackle….this look is beyond!

by Vincent Levy