Saturday 25th March

| BY Natalie Dembinska

Margaret Howell: The Collection

Margaret Howell The CollectionI remember a former member of Team Ten telling me about a summer job they once had at an English coastal resort in their youth. It was a blistering hot day, our protagonist was hard at work in the ice cream booth, serving 99 Flakes to a long queue of holidaymakers looking for a way to cool down. Suddenly, a not-at-all-unfamiliar sensation takes over our server. The need to urinate is strong. But what to do? Shut up shop? Impossible. The punters will riot. How about adopting a “keep calm and carry on” kind of spirit and calmly pissing yourself while working instead…? The reason for this story? Margaret Howell. It may be hard to see how the two relate, but in my head, those braying masses were actually a rather polite queue of people, the kind who would happily wait through a quick loo break. And all clothed in Margaret Howell, of course. A long, snaking line of ladies dressed in impeccably cut masculine shirts, worn slightly off the shoulder, with a high-waisted knitted short or a pleated something in a sunburnt hue, not dissimilar to something out of an Agatha Christie vision of the English Riviera. Obviously, had one of these ladies been dishing out the soft serve, the “back in five minutes” sign would have gone up immediately. You don’t pee in Margaret Howell.

Take from “Ten Commandments” Issue 58 of 10 Women, ANGELS PLEASURE FLUID, on newsstands now… 

Fashion Editor Will Johns